Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Prediction for the next 9 months

One of the best things about pregnancy is that it's like a "get me out of everything" or "get me into anything" card. It rocked with Bright. Once like a week before I gave birth I got pulled over for speeding. The officer walks up and I had left my license in Aaron's car for some reason and didn't have proof of insurance or registration or anything. The cop walks back to his car to call in my plates and I got my DL# from Aaron. So I get out of my car and waddle on the icy road back to the cop wearing my HUGE Deseret Industries coat to read it to him. He gives me this pathetic laugh and tells me that I'm off the hook. He said he knew he could find me later if there was a problem. (As if my huge body were detectable by police radar or something.) It was sweet.

HOWEVER- I don't see this pregnancy being quite the same, at least not at home. Here are predictions of words sure to be uttered by me and the response sure to be garnered by Aaron.

Me: "I'm going to barf."
Aaron: "Don't complain, at least you're pregnant!"

Me: "I'm SO tired!"
Aaron: "Yeah, but be happy that you're pregnant!"

Me: "Holy cow, my ankles are the size of Maine."
Aaron: "But wouldn't you rather have fat ankles than not be pregnant!"

You get the picture. True, it's hard to feel bad about the fact that at 5 weeks I already look 12 weeks pregnant, when I'm just so GLAD I actually am pregnant! I am just disappointed that I'm not going to get as much sympathy from Aaron simply due to the fact that my gratitude should outweigh any negative side effects of pregnancy. And there are many!

Also, I am not a cute pregnant person. My face gets all puffy, I get acne, cankles, not to mention that the progress of my pregnancy can be measured by the size of my nose. Can I say how grateful I am that I'm not on TV anymore! That was NOT attractive. Ratings were probably high that period because I was the side-show freak that people liked to see. "Hey Vern, let's see how big this anchor's nose is this week!" Like those squishy rubber bugs you put in jars of water and they grow 1000%. But maybe this time I can actually answer "yes" when people in public say "You MUST be having twins." or "You must be due ANY day." (No, I'm 7 months along.)
But hey, at least I'm pregnant!


D/M C said...

I feel for ya! I got the same response. ;)

Aaron Flake said...

I'm sorry you feel that I'm not being as sympathetic as the last pregnancy Honey. But, hey, at least you’re pregnant, right? :) said...

I love reading your blogs! They are entertaining and funny! Yeah - maybe it's good that you're not on TV anymore, but the rest of us will watch your nose grow. We quite enjoy it. Hmmmm - if you looked like you were ready to have a baby any day, and you were 7 months along, what if it IS twins? That could look scary ! Hey, but don't worry - at least you're pregnant!!!!!

jessica said...

You're hilarious! I must say I haven't gotten the sympathy I deserved this pregnancy either...we can be sympathetic for each other. I'll just feel sorry for you, none of this, "At least you're pregnant." stuff!

Karen and Mike Sharp said...

Brooke! Congrats... and guess what? I'm pregnant too, and we are exactly the same weeks along! And my complaints are met with the exact same thing from Mike... "at least you're pregnant!"
Good luck to you--- and me! :)

mommy said...

Congrats on the pregnancy!!!

Miss Lerin's Momma